I've had this set up for a while but I've never bothered to try it.
For those confused I'm writing this via text.

Little space left.

I worry about my friends.

what a day?

today (well yesterday i guess) was a roller coaster. it made me realize how much i love theatre. once i got going in rehearsal all my problems seemed to melt away. once i was off stage for more then 5 minutes though , the emotions came flooding back and i came close to crying again. i don't know if nancy realizes the pain she's caused or not, but i don't intend to let her see that pain. if nothing else i will be strong to prove to myself that even in the face of destruction i can keep moving forward. aside from that good day. met Jessica, played some ninja and above all caring friends. I love you all. thank you for being there for me when i needed it.

Great weekend ends

Wow! what a weekend. probably one of the best weekends i've ever had.
If you don't want to read what i did there is more at the end that isn't what i did this weekend
going with bullet-points from here
Friday
* slept in.
* woke up at 9
* had a fantastic breakfast
* got ready
* got in limo
* PARTY
* Get out of limo with Stunner Shades (Shutter Shades)
* Jaws dropped at level of douche baggery
* sang
* got in limo
* PARTY
* got lost
* Quiet time
* Found the right place
* Got out of limo
* went through security
* Got back in limo
* went to gate
* got out of limo
* went behind the scenes of Disneyland
* Top Secret Stuff
* Performed in Disney land
* got in Limo
* PARTY
* people take pictures of us in limo
* get out of limo
* feel like a Celeb.
* go into castle
* have awesome food and watch awesome show
* buy things
* get in limo
* quiet time
* get out of limo
* SLEEP
Saturday
* Get up early
* eat
* Walk to the happiest place on earth
* Have Fun/use Joel for extra fast fun
* eat
* Have more fun!
* Have more fun still
* buy stuff
* Go back to hotel
* Change
* Walk back to Disneyland
* make way to frontier land
* Not care that "that aint a walkway man. for real."
* wait for nancy
* go to sit down
* fireworks start
* move to better view
* feel like a 9 year old for 30 minutes
* go back to group
* watch fantastically funny musical performance
* enter Merlin
* Merlin makes funny jokes
* awards begin
* I get annoyed by the group next to us
* win 1st place gold!
* get annoyed by group next to us again
* Joel wins award
* Scream
* calm down
* Kid in group next to us starts beat boxing
* Awards over
* choose between lame dance and rides
* rides
* more fun
* start riding rocket ships
* fear for my life
* Sleep
Sunday
* wake up
* Go to Ihop
* find out i don't have enough to pay for hollis' food
* Feel bad....
* rush to get packed
* get to airport
* wait
* get on plane
* get off plane
* wait for 3.5 hours
* get on plane
* get off plane

well that was my weekend

On to why i'm really writing
I guess this weekend really opened my eyes as to how estranged i am from the rest of dubs, i'm close to Hollis, Peyton and maybe sean, carly, alisa and kelsey. i'm friends with everyone, but i don't feel like i fit in, ya know? like, were i to disappear from sheldon right now, they'd notice (maybe) but none of them would really care except for the aforementioned 6. i know it seems like it's all in my head, but i know it's true. i'm nothing special to the rest, i'm just a guy involved in something great in their lives. 10 years from now, how many of them will even remember who i am? i try to get closer to them, but it seems like there is some invisible barrier that i am stuck behind while everyone else can pass through. i don't know why it's taken me so long to realize what it was that was making me feel this way. i've had the feeling since dubs started this year, i just haven't been able to place a finger on it. i dunno. my mind is too fucked up to think about it much right now. mini-rant concluded.

hmm, i think i'll throw what i have for an unfinished, untitled song up instead of a poem that i found.

let me tell you bout my story
there ain't no fame and not much glory
the man that i am today
i owe to you, i swear it's true
so i, walk down the hall
and everything, it seems so small
in this world, we call home
through my heart, i'm left to roam


la da da da da da da da

listen up this won't take much longer
compared to other guys
i'm not harder better faster stronger
but one thing is for sure
it's you that i adore

awkward day...

so, here's how my day went, bad nosebleed school, getting set up with a date for prom that i'm not entirely sure if i'm gonna follow through with, more school, dubs, theatre, awkward times with hollis, fun times with hollis, awkwardly fun times with hollis, writing. the end

decision made

so, since there haven been any suggestions as to how i should ask this person to prom and i cant think of anything creative, I'm just gonna do it the old fashioned way with a simple "_____ would you like to go to prom with me?"

Prom

Keeping it short, i'm thinking of asking someone to prom but i want to do it in at least a semi-classy way but i need ideas, so, what do you recommend?

Hello again

it's been a while hasn't it? at least a few days, probably a week.

so, how are you guys? hopefully everything is going good, i'm sure i have some lurkers i just don't know how to tell how many... i got my permit renewed today and became a registered voter. i'm not quite sure what to think of that.

i've been in need of some good old dancing in the rain... i haven't had a chance to yet... yes it's been raining but when it is i'm either at school or have stuff with me and am trying to get home as fast as possible so that i don't.

so i just found out that there is going to be a new A-Team movie... why must Hollywood ruin all that is good and right? there is a chance it'll be a good movie but i am not getting my hopes up. i did for watchmen and was sorely disappointed.

why is making a song so hard? specifically finding/writing lyrics? i mean honestly, I've cycled through at least a hundred poems today and found maybe one that i can do something with... i give up... at some point i'll hire a writer to write songs for me, i'll give them a general idea and some specifics so that i can relate to it personally.

I've been talking to Hollis a lot recently, it's refreshing, and fun. we tend to ramble on about seemingly nothing... until i kill the conversation that is. then we start on something else. we can talk for such a long time though. take today for example, we started talking at 8:30pm and talked until 11:04. i haven't managed to have long conversations with people in a long time, i forgot how good being social felt.

i haven't even felt the need to blog thanks to Hollis. I have nothing to get out, no anger to vent, no big angst (just the normal teenage boy stuff) the only thing that I have to rant about right now is the A-Team movie. Just talking to Hollis has improved my overall outlook on life and has led to me being happy again, really happy, that genuine happy where you can't wipe the grin off your face no matter how hard you try. I can only hope that i have returned a fraction of what she has given me back to her.

Time to ruin the size streak. i case you didn't notice, the paragraphs were getting longer and longer, but that stops here.

I've recently been watching If I Can Dream. it an online show that helps people achieve their dreams. i feel like such a stalker when i'm watching it though since there are 24-7 live video feeds watching them. i can watch them sleep if i wanted.

tried to audition for glee today but it failed. after i recorded my introductory statement i uploaded it and it wouldn't do anything from there.

Well i guess that's about all for tonight. Poem time:
this one is personalized it's called Pair. it's by Sandra Simon
You’re someone there, just like a “pair”
Who’d be there in times of despair…

Just like hands or eyes or feet.
you’ll help me up when i am beat,
With one wink and the day’s brightened,
you’ll run with me when i'm suddenly frightened…

I wonder why I’m writing this,
To someone whom I used to hardly miss,
So weird, so queer, but yet subtly sweet…
Indeed a friend… Hollis, you're neat!
Someone who was once my stranger


Kind of an abrupt end isn't it? oh well. G'night